Tonight while at the gym I started walking towards the nearest empty elliptical (which was pretty far) and a horrific fart came on. I couldn't contain it, and it got released like a bad virus outbreak. I crop-dusted like 8 people before finally realizing it was going to be obvious it was me since the stank cloud would be still around me.

I pretended I had to do something and walked back (double crop-dusting) and went into the bathroom and got some water from the fountain.

When I came back another elliptical opened up on another row, so I took that one.